Celebrate Earth Day! Right Now, Dammit!

Yep, today, April 22nd is Earth Day, which, although not technically Earth’s birthday (like we know when that is), is still a good occasion for celebrating the wonders of this planet and everything on it. I don’t think there’re any festivals or anything, but what the hey — if the weather holds, at least it’ll be a good time to get outside. Pretty soon we won’t be able to set foot in our backyards and city streets without a canteen and burnoose…

Note, by the way, there’s another Earth Day, one that took place back on March 20th. Apparently there’s some kind of feud between the two; maybe it’s a West Hemisphere-East Hemisphere kinda thing, with Oxfam-ers doing “green” drivebys on Sierra Clubbers (recycleable paper shell casings?) and innocent Wilderness Society members caught in the crossfire. (O maybe not. And heck, since I donate to all three, the situation would cause ethical dilemmas for me that’d make The Departed look like SpongeBob Squarepants.)

“So, now that it’s Earth Day,” you ask, “what can I do? How do I celebrate this wonderful pseudo-holiday?” Well, I could tell you to send Earth Day e-cards to your friends and family, but really, it’s a lot simpler than that: get the fuck outside. No, really. Turn off your computer, right freakin’ now, and go. I mean it.