Crystal Skulls, Outgoing Behavior

Music reviews tend to be of two types. The first is the type where the reviewer tells you how Artist A sounds like Artist B. The second compares this new material by Artist A with earlier material by Artist A. Both of these review types serve the purpose of giving you something to go on. They give you a shorthand way to know if you’re going to like what the reviewer is going on about because words just don’t really tell you what something sounds like.

I could say, for example, that the music is dense. Or that it’s filled with harpsichord. Or that it’s contagiously catchy. But then I’d go back and listen to the music and realize how flimsy words are. Here’s the first paragraph of the review I was going to write:

With a name like Crystal Skulls, I was expecting (possibly hoping) that I was in for something like Swedish death metal. Something melodic, yet with Cookie Monster vocals. This is about as far from metal as could be possible, however. This is ’70s rock. And it’s not the sort of ’70s rock that early ’90s Seattle bands repopularized. This is ’70s light rock. With a touch of prog. It’s like Steely Dan and Nick Drake and Todd Rundgren. All at the same time.

Now that would make a fine beginning, if I do say so myself. I start off telling you what the music isn’t and then I compare it to some well-known artists and then add a little humor for seasoning. But what would happen if I just told you what the music isn’t? Or used metaphors that don’t resemble the sounds at all? Could you tell what it sounded like from that sort of negative review? That is to say, “negative” in the “this is what the music is not” sense, rather than the “dude, this sucks” sense.

Let’s start off with the death metal. There is little in the way of distorted guitar on Outgoing Behavior. Nor is the guitar tuned down. Vocals are not screamed. And there is no double-kick action. None of the songs are ostensibly about death or Satan or killing. Though I’ve seen only a handful of pictures of Crystal Skulls, none of them feature white face paint or all black attire. So, as I mentioned in my false first paragraph above, it’s safe to say that nobody will confuse Crystal Skulls with death metal.

Critics love comparing new music to The Beatles. In this situation, comparing Crystal Skulls to The Beatles is not a bad comparison, so making it a bad comparison is hard, but I’m willing to give it the old college try. The Beatles split up their singing duty. Even Ringo had one song per album. Crystal Skulls are not like that. They just have the one main singer, with some backing vocals. The Beatles loved to use a straight 4/4 rhythm that many of their peer bands also used. It eventually became known as Merseybeat. Crystal Skulls are not in the Merseybeat tradition.

Let’s try this with Rush. Rush is what some call a “power trio.” All songs feature only the three musicians and are therefore intentionally limited. Crystal Skulls are four people. Rush features the fingernails-on-blackboard voice of Geddy Lee. Not only do Crystal Skulls not feature Geddy Lee, but their singer (Christian Wargo) isn’t grating at all. Many of Rush’s songs are written to demonstrate its members’ proficiency. There are quick starts and stops. Crystal Skulls, while not slouches with their instruments, do not compose their songs to show off their instrumental prowess. Also, Rush are also Canadian. Crystal Skulls are not Canadian, though the CD claims that it was made there.

Finally, let’s compare Crystal Skulls to a washing machine. Washing machines vary, but most emit a watery, repetitive sound. Crystal Skulls are not watery and not nearly as repetitive. Washing machines will get your clothes clean. It’s not clear at all to me how Crystal Skulls would get your clothes clean. So Crystal Skulls are much less practical than a washing machine.

Hopefully this exercise gives you a good idea what Crystal Skulls sound like. They are not very much like death metal, Rush, or a washing machine and are only modestly similar to The Beatles. If you don’t get a clear picture of Crystal Skulls’ sound in your head, you may just have to go out and pick up a copy of Outgoing Behavior to get a better idea.